tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6319921527453210584.post4164838438664353961..comments2023-05-26T07:41:53.109-05:00Comments on Afterthoughts On A Whirlwind Journey: There Are No Good Titles For This PostUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6319921527453210584.post-15316228462894025942007-12-07T01:06:00.000-06:002007-12-07T01:06:00.000-06:00It was good to hear you were honest with your pare...It was good to hear you were honest with your parents. When they see God at work to help you, now they will appreciate it even more.<BR/><BR/>I am praying.MRhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16747154844168947527noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6319921527453210584.post-52987820198826252222007-12-05T22:27:00.000-06:002007-12-05T22:27:00.000-06:00Learner Man,Good to hear from you. Your thoughts ...Learner Man,<BR/><BR/>Good to hear from you. Your thoughts about telling your parents were exactly as mine. I don't think I ever really thought they'd handle it bad, but I wasn't sure the positives to telling them would outweigh the negatives. Really, if for no other reason, just being able to no longer keep this a secret from them has made it worth telling them. I can just relax now and not worry so much about having to cover my tracks and the like. They know now, so it's a weight off my shoulders. Thing is, don't tell them until your comfortable about telling them.<BR/><BR/>I'm glad that things are going great for you. That really is good news. Oh, and I beg to differ with you about who has the best whiskey. Kentucky's the best all the way ;)<BR/><BR/>God bless ya.Brendonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18248268499428066786noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6319921527453210584.post-13162340099159576902007-12-05T16:41:00.000-06:002007-12-05T16:41:00.000-06:00Well done mate, it took guts to share that with yo...Well done mate, it took guts to share that with your folks. I know I'm not there yet. My parents aren't really walking with God just now and so I find the thought of sharing this with them quite hard. I want a sound, Godly response. To be honest, I don't know how they would react. I've a feeling they wouldn't feel any different towards me but they also wouldn't be able to do anything to help me or move me forwards so them knowing seems pretty pointless. <BR/><BR/>I don't know if I can be that vulnerable with them yet... all in good time. <BR/><BR/>Haven't been able to blog myself recently as have been extremely busy (well I think I have). Have also applied a filter to my computer and am waiting for my flatmate to adjust the settings so I can access my own blog. Things are goin great though. Can't wait to tell everyone about it all.<BR/><BR/>Once again, well done mate, I'm chuffed for ya! I must say however, that the best whisky comes from this side of the Atlantic!!! :p. <BR/><BR/>Bless you,<BR/><BR/>DaveDavehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15104993865307022046noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6319921527453210584.post-15815787813885152172007-12-05T14:56:00.000-06:002007-12-05T14:56:00.000-06:00Rik, you've been really great, and I could never t...Rik, you've been really great, and I could never thank you enough. Hug right back at ya. I couldn't help but laugh at the prospect of still voting Republican. Being Republican, yep that's probably still going to happen. And yeah, the whiskey here in KY is pretty good.<BR/><BR/>You're right about the things you said. My parents are probably feeling a lot of things about this, and probably ARE questioning themselves and worrying some. It's gonna take time.<BR/><BR/>I have had a little bit of "buyer's remorse" about this, but I do think it was a good thing that I told them. Or, at least I HOPE it was a good thing.<BR/><BR/>Thanks for being there for me, Rik.<BR/><BR/>Jennypo, I'm glad I've been able to encourage you. You're actually the first person to ever call me a "Rock". That's encouraging for me, in terms of relating that to Peter when Jesus called HIM that. Being able to fight and move forward and to know that God is helping me all the way. Thanks.<BR/><BR/>Joe, yeah, I wasn't actually thinking about Christmas when I told them, but I did after the fact. That sort of got me to wondering if I should have bit my lip a little harder and waited until after the new year. But I'm glad I didn't wait. I'd rather end the year on this note, rather than begin one that way. But, I am glad it had to be at the beginning of the month instead of any closer to Christmas. Yeah, I don't think that would have been too good.<BR/><BR/>Thanks everyone.Brendonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18248268499428066786noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6319921527453210584.post-21878902715727876082007-12-05T09:53:00.000-06:002007-12-05T09:53:00.000-06:00Brandon,I was thinking about you last night and th...Brandon,<BR/><BR/>I was thinking about you last night and this morning on my way to work. I am praying for ya buddy.<BR/><BR/>Tell me if any of this sounds familiar:<BR/><BR/>Are you having thoughts like “I can’t believe I told them, I can’t believe I told them, I can’t believe I told them...” or “They know, they know, they know....” or perhaps regrets, “Why did I tell them,? Why did I tell them? Why did I tell them?...”<BR/><BR/>If so, these “buyer’s regrets” are normal and they are part of the shame that we tend to feel which stems from the fear that has kept us in a prison for so long. <BR/><BR/>In time this will pass, but you’d be a lot better off if you had some close friends to reassure you. Since I know you don’t have any. Let me try to do the best that I can from a long ways away.<BR/><BR/>I love you Brandon and Jesus loves you. THAT will never change.<BR/><BR/>Your father may be wondering, “Why didn’t Brandon tell me sooner?” and it bothers him that you kept this burden to yourself for so long. He may also be blaming himself, examining his worth as a father and wondering, “Where did I go wrong?”<BR/><BR/>These too are normal reactions of a father.<BR/><BR/>I think parents also have dreams that their children will get married one day and give them grandchildren. Then when they hear that one of their children is gay or has homosexual temptations that dream is lost and reality is hard to face.<BR/><BR/>Right now I am struggling with having feelings of resentment towards both of my parents. My father was a coward who abdicated his role as head of the household and my mother, in trying to save the family, emasculated him by keeping him from having to deal with the consequences of his failure. Hence, while my mother was trying to help she actually undermined his role and responsibility and took the reins as head of the household. It is going to take some time, but eventually I’ll get beyond this and realize that they didn’t have godly parents either and were clueless as parents. So, what I need to do is learn form their mistakes and sins and not repeat them.<BR/><BR/>Brandon, you are NOT alone. I wish I could be there to give you a big hug and then buy you a beer or something. But, I’m out here in Californication where the best wine in the world is made and you’re out there where they make great whiskey.<BR/><BR/>Hang in there... you will get through this. Keep praying, read His word and watch some Mark Driscoll videos on the net. This dude cracks me up!<BR/><BR/>Love ya bro!<BR/><BR/>RikErikhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01618960202550806181noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6319921527453210584.post-73905853639279199202007-12-04T17:58:00.000-06:002007-12-04T17:58:00.000-06:00God bless you Brandon. I think it was wise to get ...God bless you Brandon. I think it was wise to get this out in the open at the beginning of December.<BR/><BR/>I'll be praying everyone in your family is little less "unsettled" about the whole issue in a few weeks and you all have a wonderful Christmas.Joehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06072559194882912598noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6319921527453210584.post-11178952214422233612007-12-04T17:30:00.000-06:002007-12-04T17:30:00.000-06:00Wow, Brandon, I am so glad for you! Congratulatio...Wow, Brandon, I am so glad for you! Congratulations! It must be wonderful to have that out in the open, even if it makes things uncomfortable for a while. Of course it will take your parents time to adjust, but how amazing they are to accept your news so well.<BR/><BR/>I'll be praying for you. It encourages me to see you struggling forward as you are. Even though I'm not dealing with SSA, this old life is a tough one all the way around. Seeing you crawl forward when you have no strength and sometimes fly when you do have it gives me hope that I can, too. God bless you. You rock.jennypohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08885906238155398438noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6319921527453210584.post-48630702214371870172007-12-04T17:15:00.000-06:002007-12-04T17:15:00.000-06:00Brandon,You say "All I know is that my emotions ha...Brandon,<BR/><BR/>You say "All I know is that my emotions have been all over the place the last few days"<BR/><BR/>Bro - this is common and you're going to be on a roller coaster for a while. If you need to vent, write me or call me.<BR/><BR/>Most Christians, especially our old fart parents, are not mentally or emotionally equipped to deal with these issues.<BR/><BR/>Also, it is not uncommon for parents to blame themselves for their sons having SSA. So pray for them. Your dad may be bottling up all his emotions and still in a state of shock.<BR/><BR/>Let them know that you love them and that you still love Jesus and might even vote republican. That will help them a lot.<BR/><BR/>If your mom is keeping her distance, just hug her and tell her that you love her without any justification for it. If she wants to cry, let her cry.<BR/><BR/>For yourself, keep busy and don't let yourself go back into your old habits for dealing with emotional stress.<BR/><BR/>You and your parents are going to get through this and I am praying for you.<BR/><BR/>If your parents need someone to talk to - they can call or write me too!<BR/><BR/>Keep the faith!<BR/><BR/>RikErikhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01618960202550806181noreply@blogger.com