To say I was feeling low last Wednesday would be a severe understatement. That last post reflects a lot of my thoughts lately: I’m alone, my family doesn’t want me around, I can’t make friends, I’m tired of fighting, I don’t have but a thread of strength left in me, I have trouble trusting, my faith is shaken, I don’t understand what God’s trying to teach me, I want a boyfriend… the list just seems to go on and on.
I’m sorry if I freaked anyone out. I have just felt so completely conflicted about so many things lately. And even though there are things I know I can look forward to, I just can’t seem to build up any sort of optimism within me for any of those things at the moment.
I know I’ve just not been in the best frame of mind lately. I know I need to figure certain things out for myself, and it’s just not happening. I keep trying, wanting, praying, and seeking for life to get better. I’m trying all I can to keep hope that it will, but my strength and resolve and trust just haven’t really been there like I know it should be.
Thanks to everyone who’s tried to cheer me up or encourage me. I really appreciate each of your prayers and concern. Maybe next time I can write about something a little better.