In the Image of God

I have heard people say that the way we view God is often in relation to how we view our fathers. If we view our fathers positively, we will likely view God positively. If we view our fathers negatively, we will likely view God negatively. I believe this is true because it seems to mirror how I have felt about God before. There have been times in my life when I felt a lot of anger, disappointment, sadness, or frustration with my dad, and, looking back, I can see how during those times, some of those same feelings were projected onto God as well. Then, there have also been times when I got along really well with my dad, felt very close to him, and likewise felt that way toward God. Knowing that God is the ultimate father, it is simply hard not to compare our earthly fathers to him. However, I would say that our view of God may be influenced by more than just our fathers.

From biblical teaching, we know that God is always referred to in the male form, but that he created both male and female in his own image. So, mightn’t our view of God also be in light of how we view our mothers? I think it is certainly possible. Our mothers, above all, can show us the gentleness of God, the patience of God, and the unconditional love of God, perhaps better than our fathers ever could. I say this because these are characteristics more commonly expressed by females than males, but not to mean that all women are like this or that no man can be; either could be true. With this in mind, if the relationship with our mothers becomes strained, might we not also experience a strain in our relationship with God?

There is another area of influence which goes beyond gender itself, and one which I believe more commonly influences our relationship with God than anything else does, and that is in our relationships with those of authority. Our fathers and mothers are certainly authority figures, but so are church elders and deacons, preachers, grandparents (or older relatives), teachers, politicians, and employers. These are people we can look up to or look down upon, have good relationships with or poor relationships with. If we feel unloved, uncared for, and unwanted by one or both of our parents, by a teacher, an elder or deacon in church, a preacher, or our boss, might we not also feel that their treatment of us in this regard is an extension of how God feels about us? If we constantly disapprove of and mistrust our political leaders, might we not also grow to feel the same about God? All of this is possible, because of the correlation we may see consciously or unconsciously between those having great authority over our lives, and God, who we are told has the greatest authority, not only over our lives but over everything.

Two other areas of influence may be in our relationships with peers and how we view ourselves. If our peers reject us, then might we not also feel rejected by God? When one is friendless, it is easy to become isolated, lonely, bitter, resentful, and just in general to become an outcast, if not in reality then at least in mind where the thought that nobody, including God, must want anything to do with you. And if you begin to think little of yourself, for whatever reason, it can certainly become difficult imagining anyone else feeling any better about you. If our peers flock to us thinking we are really something special, though, then might we not also feel that God wants to be with us and thinks we are special? If we feel good about ourselves, or like whom we are, then might we not also be more likely to think God will like us too? I think it is possible.

Looking at all of this, it is very likely, at least to my mind, that our view of God can be greatly viewed as an extension of how we view others in our lives who hold similar traits to God. Here’s an example just to illustrate this theory. If a man’s father wants nothing to do with him, his mother isn’t gentle, caring or considerate in her approach to him, his preacher, teacher, or other authority figures are not patient with him or have broken his trust somehow, and his peers reject him, then might that same man not also come to believe that, in general, he isn’t wanted, loved, respected or cared about by anyone, including God? After all, if everyone else treats him a certain way, why would God be any different? Mustn’t there be something about him that makes him unworthy of God? It is easy to see the mindset that can form against God when looking at how people treat each other. Maybe that is why Jesus commanded us to do to others the way we would want done unto us. Our influence over each other is so profound and lasting that it can reach all aspects of our lives, including influencing our relationship with God.

The good news, however, is that God is not everybody else. He is flawless, perfect, and pure in everything he does. Humans are not this way. We are fallen, imperfect, and certainly far from pure in most cases. Just because someone fails you, that doesn’t mean God will do the same. Just because someone hates you, doesn’t mean God hates you. Just because someone rejects you, doesn’t mean God will reject you. What we have to keep in mind is that we are in God’s image, and not the other way around. God is not an expression of us, we are an expression of him, one that has been weakened and flawed because of our sin. So when we view God through the lens of how we view others, we are wrong to do so. We can certainly see God at times through other people, but that doesn’t mean that we can see God in everything somebody else does. Only Jesus holds that distinction. The rest of us, too much of the time, fall short.

CNN (and other liberal media) v. Justin Bieber

Justin Bieber has apparently kicked up quite a bit of controversy in a recent interview he did with Rolling Stone magazine. In the interview he was asked about his thoughts on a wide range of issues including religion, sex, healthcare, abortion, and certain other political thoughts.

On the issue of abortion, Bieber stated: “I really don’t believe in abortion. I think [an embryo] is a human. It’s like killing a baby.” When asked if he is anti-abortion even in cases of rape, he said, “Well, I think that’s really sad, but everything happens for a reason. I don’t know how that would be a reason. I guess I haven’t been in that position, so I wouldn’t be able to judge that.”

When I read some of the responses to his anti-abortion comments yesterday attached to a Netscape article, it seemed that most were of the opinion that until Bieber grows a vagina of his own, he should have no right to comment on abortion. I particularly found many of the responses insulting.

To begin with, abortion is not just a woman’s issue. Regardless, ladies, of what anyone would have you to believe, if you become pregnant, the fetus inside of you is not yours alone. Remember, it takes two to tango, and the creation inside of you belongs, in half, to someone else. It’s the same concept as if you swallowed a diamond that belongs equally to you and someone else and then claim that the diamond solely belongs to you because it is now inside of you. Nice try, but, sorry, no. Just because the diamond is inside of you, that doesn’t make it yours alone. It may do all those who believe so strongly in abortion to keep this in mind before they choose a sexual partner. You don’t want to get pregnant, then don’t have sex, and don’t have unprotected sex. And if you do become pregnant, the guy involved will have at least some say or involvement in the matter (usually far less than he should). Regardless, the guy will be in your life to some extent and you will have to deal with him. But to suggest that Justin Bieber should not be allowed an opinion about abortion just because he is male is so gender biased it is ridiculous. Abortion is not a woman’s rights issue, it is a human life issue, and that affects all of us, male and female.

What disgusts me the most about the reaction to Bieber’s comments however is the notion that his age (16) makes him too young to intelligently comment on such a thing as abortion. Several media hosts, including the ladies on the View and CNN’s Kyra Phillips, have brought the young pop star’s age into question.

While discussing the interview with her guest this morning, Phillips had the following things to say about Bieber. “When you don’t really know what you’re talking about at the age of sixteen, should you be addressing controversial issues like abortion?” She went on to say, “It just seems like something this young kid shouldn’t be talking about.” Her guest reacted by saying, “There’s no place for him to be commenting. He’s sixteen!” Then at the end of the discussion, Phillips concluded with, “He’s [Bieber] still very young, he’s got a lot of growing up to do, a lot of experiences to have, and then maybe when he matures a little bit he can talk about these issues.”

Now, I’m sorry, but are you, Phillips, really insinuating that because of his age, Bieber cannot talk intelligently about the issue? Furthermore, that he is wrong in his beliefs and will, in time, with more “maturity” realize he is wrong? Just who exactly do you think you are to suggest such a thing? The kid gave a valid opinion. He’s not eight years old, he’s sixteen. I’d hate to know a sixteen year old who has not given some thought about such a thing as abortion (especially considering the amount of teen pregnancies that still exist in this country). I remember students having opinions and writing essays about abortion when I was in the fifth and sixth grades (ages 11 to 12), and many of their arguments were based on the same ones I hear people talk about today. Believe it or not, young people do have opinions on matters such as this, and not all of them are uninformed, naïve, or misguided opinions. A lot of young people actually do research and take all of the arguments into consideration.

What the media is really concerned about is that Bieber—this phenomenal pop icon—actually, heaven forbid, has some conservative beliefs and doesn’t mind sharing them. It’s not about his age, it’s that he has a huge following, mostly comprised of teen girls, and the media can’t believe he would actually express a conservative viewpoint to all of those young female followers. So, to counter him, they have gone on a bashing spree to discredit his intelligence.

What’s more is that Bieber does not have some wild and absurd viewpoint. His opinion on abortion mirrors that of most conservatives in this country. I, a man in his late twenties, actually agree with Bieber’s viewpoints on abortion. When you are pro-life, you believe abortion is wrong, even sometimes in cases of rape. Having that belief, at any age, does not make you unintelligent. My own belief in this matter is based on the fact that I was conceived out of wedlock. My parents were unmarried high school students at the time. I realize they could have aborted me, and by some peoples standards my parents would have been more than justified in doing so. They were young (my mom only a year older at the time than Justin Bieber currently is), unmarried, had hopes of going to college, and knew they would face ridicule from others. I am glad they chose to let me live. I have seen politicians, businessmen, and others talk about being the product of rape, and likewise, being grateful that they too were not aborted, but given the chance to live. When you are the product of such experiences, you are more than intelligent on the matter. You are an expert, and your opinion should matter a great deal. When others express similar opinions, there viewpoints should matter as well, and not be belittled for reasons that are purely political.

So, I say to Kyra Phillips, and all those others who have tried to belittle Bieber, that you should be ashamed of yourselves. If you disagree with someone, that is one thing. You have a right to disagree. But to insinuate that someone is unintelligent or naïve simply because they disagree with you is morally wrong and unacceptable.

Political Ramblings

I have to say there has been a lot going on lately. I haven't written about it yet--though I've certainly wished to (I've just been too distracted)--but I want to say a few words about the decision recently made by congress to repeal the military's policy of "Don't ask, don't tell", which banned homosexuals from openly serving in the military. I say now, it was about freaking time this was done. For a long time I have believed this ban to be one of the last great means of discrimination in the workforce. I know and understand some of the arguments people have had in favor of the ban. Some straight troops just do not want to shower and dress and sleep in the same places as gay ones. I can understand this. The problem, however, is that this was and is already happening--the straight troops just didn't know it. Perhaps people are just happier not knowing about the truths around them. But, I fail to see where this objection is sufficient to discriminate against gays. Implement a policy of respectfulness and, maybe, even a schedule of bathroom times (because in all honesty, I can understand straight guys not wanting gay guys to see them naked. As a gay man, it would make me somewhat uncomfortable as well on certain levels). Anyway, that's my thoughts on the subject. I just feel it was about time our government did this. It should have happened years ago. And I commend the democratic congress and President Obama for seeing this through (finally).

Something else I want to mention is the situation going on in Egypt. I won't take a side on the matter, because it's simply not my country and I don't know all of the issues going on. However, I do hope the level of violence seen in that country in the last few days will subside and whoever wins the conflict, a greater level of peace, prosperity, and freedom will come to the people there. And not only in Egypt, but for the people facing similar troubles in Yemen, Jordan, Syria, and other countries in the region as well. And now, to say something that I'm sure a great many will hate me for saying, this was something George W. Bush predicted would happen. Once people get a taste for freedom, freedom will spread like wildfire. To me, it looks like what Bush was saying all those years has actually started to take place. Maybe he knew a bit about what he was talking about after all.

Now I leave you with this incredibly great song by the Newsboys titled Born Again. Enjoy!

Darling I Do

This is quite possibly the most beautiful song I've ever heard.



Of late, I can say that life has been good. I am officially a college graduate now, which is something that seemed so very long in the making. I honestly didn't know a few years ago if that would even be possible. When I first got back in school, it had been after a five year hiatus. To say that I struggled is a bit of an understatement. But, I stuck with it. I have God to thank for that, because if it hadn't been for him, I'd have dropped out again after just a couple of months. Now, two years later, I think I can say without any reservations that going back to school and earning a college degree is the most profound decision I ever made in my life. God saw me through it every step of the way. And I saw God intervening time and again to help me. He gave me friends. He gave me strength and determination. He gave me knowledge. He gave me self-confidence. He gave me love. And He gave me a plan for the future.

I have known plenty of people with eyes closed to God. And that's very sad. They cannot see all that he has done and is doing for them. They miss out on so much. I've been there myself. Lately, however, I keep seeing God at work in me and in the events taking place all around me. I'm glad I can see these things. Life is better because I have seen these things. They help me to know that I'm not going through life alone--someone is with me at all times. I find that very comforting.

With that in mind, I find myself singing the song above substituting the lyrics "Darling" with "Jesus". It just seems befitting to do that.

Since this is my first post of the new year, I want to wish anyone who reads this a very wonderful, blessed year. May you each see God working in your lives each and every day of it.

Gay Parents = Gay Kids?

Sorry I've been gone for so long. I'm in the middle of my last semester at college. So, as you can imagine, it's been very time consuming (but also very fun and enjoyable).

I read this article on gay parents being more likely than straight parents to produce gay children and found it intriguing and worth writing about. The statistics and research presented in this article/study doesn't surprise me at all. To begin with, if homosexuality is genetic, then it only fits that gay parents may pass on gay genes to their children, thus causing their children to also become gay. Likewise, it makes perfect sense to me that if homosexuality is environmentally based, homosexual parents may be more likely (either intentionally or unintentionally) to have an influence on their children also becoming homosexual. I can certainly see how a child growing up in a home with homosexual parents would at the very least be much more open to the idea of being with someone of the same sex (just as heterosexual parents may influence their children to becoming heterosexual--again, if sexuality is environmentally based). Regardless of the origin/s of homosexual orientation, I think all people can agree that parents of any type have an overwhelming influence on the kids they raise. And for that reason alone, I'm not surprised to find evidence that gay parents are statistically more likely to have gay children.

Prop 8 Overturned

So the news today is that the highly controversial gay marriage ban in California, known as Proposition 8, has been struck down by Chief U.S. District Judge Vaughn Walker. I could go into all the details of this ruling, but those are points of interest which many others are sure to write about on other sites, so I will refrain from going there. I will, however, give you my thoughts on this decision…

I say it’s about time.

As you all know, I am a Christian. I am also gay (I say that only meaning that I find other guys attractive). What this means is that I can somewhat objectively look at the issue of gay marriage from two different perspectives. In a lot of ways, I do agree with a lot of those in support of Prop 8. I believe marriage was designed and defined by God, and that it was meant to be something between a man and a woman only. I also agree that marriage has historically only been that way. However, I am not in support of Proposition 8.

My reasons for this are many. To begin with, I don’t believe anyone has the right to tell two consenting adults what sort of relationships they should or should not be allowed to have with each other. It’s nobody’s business if two men (or two women) want to love and be with each other and celebrate their relationship through a state of marriage. Just like what goes on in their bedroom is no one else’s business. I really wonder what straight people would think and feel if they were told they couldn’t have sex anymore, or date, or get married. They’d find it a travesty and an outrage. And yet, when they tell gay people they can’t do those things, it’s supposed to be perfectly okay, and they can’t understand the outcry against them. Go figure, but I find the argument on their part more than hypocritical. Just as I think it’s nothing short of immoral to prevent gay partners from having things such as inheritance, medical, and parental rights.

Secondly, I don’t think it is right for Christians to force (or at least try to force) their viewpoints onto others. I get so frustrated by people who think everyone should believe exactly as they do. And, again, when they try to force their viewpoints onto others and the response given back to them is mostly negative, they just can’t seem to understand this. They cut their own throats by trying to bully people into their way of thinking. Now, on this point, it is my belief that if Christians would say “live and let live” and allow gays and lesbians just to live their lives and make their own choices, and actually treat them with kindness, respect, love, and understanding—you know, the way Jesus treated people—then the response given back to them would be more positive. As I’ve said before, you can’t win flies with vinegar.

Thirdly, the whole argument that gay marriage will destroy the family is so bogus it’s laughable. How can gay marriage possibly devastate the family more than divorce? You’re talking about two men who may or may not somehow end up being able to raise a kid. Wow, the horror of it! It’s not like that’s something that doesn’t already happen among heterosexuals. I’m helping to raise my brother’s kids, for instance (think of Two and Half Men also—that’s a more common family set up than you may think). Oh, and, if you didn’t know, Christians have the highest divorce rate in this country. Anyone who has been through a divorce or experienced their parent’s divorce should know just how devastating that can be on everyone involved. Seems like if marriage was so important to Christians, then they’d actually, you know, work more on their own marriages.

And before this post just turns into a complete rant, I’ll leave my reasoning at that. What I’ve said so far is enough in itself to believe that gay marriage should be allowed. I don’t have to agree or approve of gay marriage, but I’ll be if I’m going to block others from it if that’s something they want to do.

Awkwardness in the Underwear Aisle

School is about to begin again. This will be my last semester until graduation, which means I’ll be student teaching. I’m nervous about this, but ready for it to begin. I think I’m more anxious than anything for it to just be over with, that way I can finally get hired somewhere and begin a new chapter of my life. It’s what I’ve been working toward for the last two years now.

Anyway, the other day I went to the store to pick up some things I knew I’d be needing for school; mostly new clothes, since I didn’t have enough formal attire for teaching that would satisfy being in a school five days a week (khaki pants and dress shirts). Like most people, I wear underwear, and that being the case, I knew it wouldn’t hurt to pick up a few new pairs while I was at it. So, I found myself walking down the underwear aisle. You might imagine that this is an aisle frequented mostly by men, but you’d be wrong in assuming that. It never fails that whenever I go to pick out underwear the aisle has at least one or two women standing around—no doubt shopping for their husbands—and I usually turn out to be the only guy around. Now, I don’t know if women find it awkward for men to be in the ladies underwear aisles (for whatever reason they would be), but I’ll admit I find it quite awkward to be choosing, and thereby announcing, what sort of underwear I wear in front of women. It almost, in a weird sort of way, just makes me feel naked in front of them, as if all of a sudden I’m stripped right down to my underwear. Because of this, I try to avoid going down the men’s underwear aisle until it is in the clear (though this is nearly impossible, because for every women that leaves, another seems to always show up, which just makes me end up wanting to scream for all of them to get out of the place—though I never actually have).

Not only do I find it awkward picking out underwear with women staring over my shoulder, but being of the sexual persuasion I am, I admit it seems a bit awkward to go walking down an aisle looking at a bunch of packages with almost completely naked (and usually good looking) men plastered all over their covers. I often find myself holding my breath and my heart rate increasing while in this aisle, which just makes me a bit self-conscious, wondering if my appeal to the imagery is noticeable to others. I do try not to look too long at any of the packages. I know which type of underwear I generally like (and to satisfy any curiosities, I’ll tell you it’s Hanes boxer briefs) and so I can usually just get them and go and all remains good in the world. But there are times when I can’t find the usual and do have to do some looking to decide what I want.

I wonder if the reason the men’s underwear aisle is usually devoid of other men is because, like me, most men just feel uncomfortable being there. If someone sees you looking at how the underwear looks on another guy, will they think you’re gay? I can imagine other men thinking this, whether gay or straight. Most men may just not like seeing all of those pictures of other men. There again, like me, they may just not like choosing their underwear in front of women. As for the women, I suppose they could just be a bunch of pervs who, like me, find the packaging appealing, but, unlike me, feel unabashed about looking.

What do you think?